lukewarm.

when did this happen?

where was this fall?

no matter where i look

i can't seem to recall

the place or the time

where it all fell away

nothing sticks out

there's no exact day

when i can say 'there.

that is the moment

i made up my mind

that's when it all went

off.'

i didn't turn back

i just chose to stay

to stop running forward.

the start of the stray

not to a life of sin

but to the life of 'good'

not running up or down

i just stood

&in that standing

the Strength began to fade

until the place i stood

was the place i laid.

i wasn't a runner

just a hollow shell

and the 'good' life

is where i fell.

a life of 'good'

isn't a holy one

a life like that

is not for the Son.

peru.

&my soul is warm

the arms of angels around me

my heart breaks

the pieces fall out my eyes

tears from my soul

i'm leaving my spirit here

heaven in my fingertips

praise to God on my lips

this warmth

this peace

i know God's love now

&as i hold the angels

they hold me

each has my heart

heaven is here

my soul is here.

disappointment.

heavy on my soul

let down once more

God remind me

what is hope for?

my trust left to man

oh, i should have known

bound to disappoint

&leave me alone

Father, i beg of you

help me to see

that only trust in you

will last eternity.

light.

God, i can't see

&i'm starting to fear

i don't know where i am

or what i'm doing here

oh, Light of the world

shine Your Light on me

let my eyes be Yours

please help me to see

my steps are uncertain

&my path unclear

please,oh God, help me

draw me near

i need Your guidance

my soul longs for You

i'm so lost, God

please show me what to do.

ashes.

i bring to You all that's left

my baggage and my pain

i come to you, falling on my knees

Lord, i need to change

take my sin and help me see

the brokenness and suffering

the hurt it has made in me

this guilt that has me so tight

Lord, just please take it away

help me to let it go

forgive me of my terrible ways

&when i repent, it's gone for good

no longer a part of me

Lord, keep these ashes on my head

remind me of who i used to be.

testify.

i fail to find the words

the ones they need to hear

i fail to hear Your voice

nothing seems clear

oh God, let me be a vessel

let Your Spirit burn like fire

all i ask is the strength

to show them my desire

help my throat unclench

please calm my pounding heart

help me speak my soul

Lord, where do i start?

i've been a witness in my actions

tried to be your hands and feet

Lord, my God, speak through me

do not let me give into defeat

help me follow Your Will

i am Yours to use

please be with me, Lord

with You i cannot lose.

remedy.

oh, my God, how i forget

the cure for everything

the hole in my heart

the pain behind her eyes

the tears in his eyes

all so easily helped

the solution we neglect

it's so simple

the remedy for our souls

more of You.

wait.

help me to know

You are in control

help me to know

without this

my human disease

of doubt

God, here

i'm giving You

my trust

Your will be done

please, oh God

help me 

truly, freely

give it to You.